I hesitated before sharing this.

I wrote it as if my body was speaking, without caving into the urge to tame it and with no need for it to be understood.

There is a ferocity in it that doesn’t fit easily into spiritual language, and a devotion that does not look gentle.

What follows is not a teaching, a ritual, or a practice.

It is a moment of truth.

Read slowly. Or don’t read at all.

But if you stay, stay with your body.

Fuck letting it go

There’s no full moon fire ceremony that can truly free you of this

The only way out is through….

Right. through. you.

Take a seat at the table and stick it on the plate in front of you

Look at it. Take it all in. One last time.

Don’t look away

Stare it in the face

Feel the heat rising in your squirming body

Your heart racing faster, acid rising in your throat

Your fists clench, your chest tightens

You can’t bear it anymore

You just want to close your eyes and pray it fades into the darkness

But deep in your heart, you know that is not how this is going down

Grab it with both hands and bring it in close until you can feel your breath on it

Speak its last rites

It came what it needed to do but now it’s done

Now it’s time to

Fucking devour it

And do it with delight

Savour every mouthful, taste the blessings it leaves behind

The lessons learnt, the wisdom gained

Even the love lost and the pain felt

These were gifts too

Let every morsel split your heart open a little more

May every sip flow through you like you are drowning in love

Let the tears drop and the bottom fall out of your world once more

Bring it all the way in and move it all the way through as if you were lovers saying their final farewell

Devour it with your full devotion

Even if it sticks in your throat

You’ve got this

Relax sweetheart, let it slide down

…..and breathe

Let it hit your stomach and fill you with joy

The sweet relief that you didn’t let it get the better of you

Lick your lips. Feel the fullness. The juicy aliveness - the energy pulsing through your veins bringing strength to your body

Feel it adding fuel to your fire

Bringing power to the creation of your unborn desires